My Rebellion Story
50 years old, grown up kids, good job, mortgage paid..
I should have been happy right?
instead I felt flat. I’d spent years surviving and I had no idea who I was without everyone needing something from me.
This Gen X little girl had big dreams. She was told she could ‘have it all’ so she was going to be a CEO of her own business or a music journalist or a famous actress
It started off well.. she worked hard, got her degree, spent her 20s working her butt off, doing 100 hours a week to impress, fending off cigar smoking gropey bosses ultimately being successful but having to leave because she wanted a family.
Her 30s were babies and toddlers and loving them so very much but being bored absolutely shitless and laden with guilt for wanting more than just that life. Eventually finding a career that that fit round school runs for small boys.
Her 40s were divorce and survival and teenagers, fighting for everything, striving and keeping heads above water and mouths fed, the excitement of hustle and chaos and long distance love.
the big 50 arrived
Mortgage paid
kids at uni, the big house, fancy car,
good income. Success!
Completed it mate.
active Motherhood – done.
18 year kid career doing well.
This was finally MY TIME.
I should be ecstatic but instead..
I had the freedom, the time but none of the joy I had expected. The person who used to jump out of bed with purpose and vigour, who found glimmers everywhere seemed to have gone.
I should have been patting myself on the back for my achievements, but it was all hollow.
Like, in fact, I had not completed it mate.. not at all.
I looked back on my life and realised most of my choices had been based on compromise to please others or born out of fear or a need for security. This was not the life I planned.
I WAS NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER
There was a gnawing feeling that there was supposed to be something more for me, something different or new but at my age what on earth could I do to change things? It was too late now, I had brain fog and no options. I numbed out my feelings and plodded on, I’d made my bed!
But then one day it struck me like a wet fish around the face
THIS COULD NOT BE IT!
I hadn’t worked so hard all my life for me to spend the rest it bored and regretful.
I DID have a choice.
I trusted my gut and I quit my job - I handed over a £500k business to someone else. It felt amazing. I rested, I reflected.
I realised I was burnt out from the years of hustle, making it work, surviving and I had lost myself completely. I had no interests or hobbies, work & kids had been my life for 23 years. I’d been in the same fairly niche industry for 18 of them, I had no concept of what other skills I had. I knew I wanted to build something of my own, on my terms, a life led business but doing what? My inner critic set to work bringing me down, reminding me of my conditioning, that I should not dare to dream.
THIS WAS THE MOMENT THE REAL REBELLION BEGAN
The rebellion is the refusal to become old with regrets – the time is now, one day ain’t coming love.
I found out I was not the only women of this age who felt numb, purposeless, lost. Loads of us KNOW there is more to life we just need to uncover what it is.
SO THIS IS MY THING! THE MIDLIFE REBELLION CLUB!
We are not broken or ‘just menopausal’, we are vital, capable people who just forgot who the fuck we are. This is not about reinvention or ‘being better’, its tapping back into who we are at our core, where that little girl with big dreams still lives. It’s stoking the flames but not to burn stuff down, to burn more brilliantly than ever!
It is being completely honest with ourselves and hanging out with other people who want the same… The Rebels!
is it time for your Rebellion?
OK, HERE’S MY CV…
Built and led a £10 Million business with two kids at home
Qualified NLP Coach & Hypnotherapy Practitioner
Degree and Post Grad diploma in media and marketing
Experienced divorce, single motherhood and burnout
Coached 1000s of women to grow in business and life
Walked away from it all and built The Midlife Rebellion Club